We come to the old saying which has so much “connotation” attached…that old “self centered” saying people choose when describing one who respects themselves as a priority. It’s a bothersome saying in my eyes, that hooks people into thinking “self centredness” is “selfish”…hey, and so what if it is? What is selfish?
What’s so bad about being selfish? To me…if I choose to prioritize myself over external demands. My point here is about being self respecting…and if that’s ever going to happen, we need to start prioritizing ourselves! I’m faced with this problem myself personally right now. Yes, I am not scared to “disclose” that I too am human. Sometimes my pieces are not together.
Life to me too is a big fat puzzle! I wish I could mince my words sometimes…to better fit my intentions of getting what I want…BUT I’m so in love with honesty…so what, there are worse things to have as your downfall. Yes I rant…let’s move on. Back to respect.
Right now I stand at a major turning point in my life. As you do.
So, from where I stand…right now, things look pretty scary! How on earth does one respect themselves enough to move gracefully in the direction of not caring about another, because in doing so, it would be to their detriment. And I mean that as in, not caring about that “other” in a way that allows them to impact the way I feel, what I do, when I do it or how.
Such dilemmas! So I’m letting you in on a little secret…I don’t have this all figured out just yet (as Alanis Morrisette understands at least). But I was dying to share this with you. As I have this great urge at the moment to throw it out there, just how real I am…and just how real life is too! It’s never boring, no…my grandfather taught me that one day! He wouldn’t have it when I told him I was bored! Now I get it too!
If you want to do things right in life, my gut tells me, there are ways to go about it…and they are not written out for you. It’s not all clear cut! We have much to cut through if we are to be liberated from our restrictions and able to freely attain our birthright for magnificence!
I just stopped myself just now from writing “it’s not all a walk in the park” but then…this voice inside my head….said, wait…stop that! It can be! Yes it can! And this is what I’m talking about. I am working through this inclination to give up and fall short of respecting my right to be “fulfilled”. Self respect is about just that! It can be a walk in the park – if we slow down enough to look at and enjoy the beauty of it!
For example…my life’s been amazing! Up, down, dark and light. And I want to share it. Respecting myself would be honouring that desire…that innate need to share it! To hide away and let my words gather dust in the journals on the shelf, while I live someone elses dream (quite brilliantly too I might add), is to forget my own importance! And you know what… My importance is not an ego driven concept…it’s a birth right!
And guess what…I am about to claim it! It’s not wrong, in my eyes. Call it selfish if you will. I think it’s a great thing! And to chase this…MY dream, I think is well worth the effort. Even if it does mean all inauthentic structures crumble. Let them fall I say. All facades erode over time. It’s the essence within that remains!